This is me.
And I Didn't Know What To Say

I was lurking around DeviantArt yesterday when Adam --- a good friend of mine --- asked me this question.

So is Chemical Engineering what I'm supposed to be doing?

(Note: You can click on the picture to make it bigger.)

I couldn't say anything.

I guess I haven't been thinking about the future very clearly. I mean, I know I'll leave school, work, and do everything grown-ups do one day. I've just never thought about the future as something pending. It seems so far away; it doesn't bear thinking about just yet.

But how far could it really be? I'll be finishing my degree in Chemical Engineering two years from now (if things go according to plan). Then what? Will I choose to work on machinery and chemistry in a plant forever?

That's sobering.

I guess the idea of being a chemical engineer is something I'm passionate about. I'm interested in the different chemical theories and how they shape my world. I enjoy solving tricky problems, and getting experiments right. What I'm learning in my university right now really challenges me, and I think that's cool.

On the other hand, there are other stuff I love to do that have no relation to Chemical Engineering. For one thing, I love to draw and take photos. I also love writing stories, knitting stuffed toys, and playing my violin. Did I mention I also enjoy designing blogs, webpages, and the occasional product label?

This paradox sometimes makes me wonder: can I do all these at once? Sure, I could try making time to do everything. But life gets busy and complicated; I know I'll eventually have to make life-changing decisions. I'll have to give up some stuff I love to make room for other things that matter.

A friend once told me it's hard to focus and do well on what you love if you love too many things. It's sort-of like trying to take five different paths when you can only go in one direction. That seems so true now.

I don't really have any answers. All I can do is listen to God, learn from others' experiences, and go with my gut feelings.

The Bible says God has great plans for me that are perfect and satisfying. I'll take comfort in that as I walk through life.

So there's your reply, Adam. It's quite long and pretty thorough. Some would even call it complicated. But I guess that's just the way it is.

Daisy on 2/09/2008 12:55:00 AM